Where On Earth…?

09 May
Warning this one is somewhat graphic.
Saturday night, I was getting James ready for bed.  He was sitting on the potty, when he suddenly lifted up his shirt, jammed his finger deep into his belly button, and vigerously began dragging said button back and forth.  He’s recently taken to dramatically pointing it out when he is scratching, but this was way over the top for an itch.  Naturally, I was curious.
Me:  James!  What are you doing?
James:  Um!….(followed by silence, a look of fierce concentration, and more extreme belly button manipulation)
Me:  James?
James:   Making the poop in my bottom come out!
Me:  Oh…OK?!
I wonder which of his little friends taught him that one?
This one isn’t so graphic.
Over the weekend, Tim chipped a tooth, chewing gum.  Seriously, who knew gum could be dangerous?  This morning, we were driving in to town to drop James off at pre-school, and James had a few questions for Tim about why we brush our teeth.
James:  Dad?
Tim:  Yeah?
James:  Why you chipped you tooth?
Tim:  Realizing that he had the perfect opportunity to sell the value of brushing to his son.)  Because I didn’t do a good job brushing when I was your age.  If you do a good job brusing your teeth, they won’t break.  (I thought we’d really scored good parenting points, but things degenerated.)
James:  So when you brush your teeth you spit them in the sink?
Tim:  What?
James:  So when you brush your teeth you spit them in the sink……. an……..the bad aliens get them?
We never did really figure that one out.  James was eating cereal at the time, and we may not have completely understood what he was saying.
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Posted by on May 9, 2009 in Kid Speak


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